A Dark Place
You have been doing a good job at hiding all that is inside you, but you also know, you won't be able to keep it that way for a very long time. You are not as strong as you were before mentally, physically, or emotionally. You try to hide it from everyone by showing you are positive, smiling, and laughing. But, it gets harder and harder each day. There are things you want to do and things that need to be done, but you can not do them because of all you have been through. You are not as strong as you were before. All you think about lately is wanting to get away, even if for a few days. But, you don't know where to go, have the means to go, and do not want to go alone.
You are with someone who loves you a great deal, does all things needed to take care of you, and yet you still sometimes feel like you are alone. You do not let out what is inside of you in front of them because you do not want them to see your weakness. You can not take care of them the way you know you should be taking care of them. This puts you even deeper into the darkness. You can see it surrounding you on every side, with no light to be found past it.
Its a darkness deeper than you have ever seen in your life. Darker than any night of the year, even without a moon. You only want to get back to feeling the way you were before, filled with life, energy, and happiness. You are happy in many ways, with the person you are with and some of the things around you. But, you know there are many things that you can not do or change. So, the darkness gets closer still. Soon you will be surrounded by the darkness to the point, there will be no way to escape. You want and need to get away, but you can't. So, you will be staying in your dark place for a while longer. Till there is a way or a bridge back to the light.
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Monday, May 28, 2012
The End of the Road
The End of the Road
You have had it, you are through. You are burnt out, used up, nothing more left to give. Yet, people still want more from you. You continue going even though you know you are on empty. Spinning your wheels with only dust flying everywhere, because you are stuck. You have been on this road for along time and now realize that you are close to the end of your journey. You can see in the short distance where your destination lays. You are ready for it to be over.
You have waited for this point in your life for a long time. You have wanted it to come sooner but could not bring yourself to stop till you reached your end. You think that no one will notice that you have stopped or that you have pulled onto a side road. You don’t want someone to come along and tow you out of it, you want the end to come quickly so you can rest. You are tired and just need to rest.
But, what you do not realize is that others are watching you at all times. They know where you are and what you are thinking. They know that you just want to stop and lay there, to disappear. If you stop, they will come to you and pull you along. That is something you do not want them to do. You only want the end to come quickly, fast, and direct.
What you perceive to be the end of your road, might not be the end. It could be a mirage or a dip in the road. Beyond, there could be many more miles you must travel to reach where you want or need to be. You are not sure you can make it all those miles. You feel as if you are traveling alone most of the time, even though you know you are not.
When you feel you are reached the end of your road, look beside you and see if there is someone else there traveling with you. Someone that you can turn to when you need to make it up yet another hill or over a mountain. That someone just might be strong enough to pull you through the rough patches in your road or out of a ditch when you slid to the side. If not, there are always others along the road that might be waiting just for you to reach where they are and willing enough to keep you fueled enough to push to the end of the road.
You have had it, you are through. You are burnt out, used up, nothing more left to give. Yet, people still want more from you. You continue going even though you know you are on empty. Spinning your wheels with only dust flying everywhere, because you are stuck. You have been on this road for along time and now realize that you are close to the end of your journey. You can see in the short distance where your destination lays. You are ready for it to be over.
You have waited for this point in your life for a long time. You have wanted it to come sooner but could not bring yourself to stop till you reached your end. You think that no one will notice that you have stopped or that you have pulled onto a side road. You don’t want someone to come along and tow you out of it, you want the end to come quickly so you can rest. You are tired and just need to rest.
But, what you do not realize is that others are watching you at all times. They know where you are and what you are thinking. They know that you just want to stop and lay there, to disappear. If you stop, they will come to you and pull you along. That is something you do not want them to do. You only want the end to come quickly, fast, and direct.
What you perceive to be the end of your road, might not be the end. It could be a mirage or a dip in the road. Beyond, there could be many more miles you must travel to reach where you want or need to be. You are not sure you can make it all those miles. You feel as if you are traveling alone most of the time, even though you know you are not.
When you feel you are reached the end of your road, look beside you and see if there is someone else there traveling with you. Someone that you can turn to when you need to make it up yet another hill or over a mountain. That someone just might be strong enough to pull you through the rough patches in your road or out of a ditch when you slid to the side. If not, there are always others along the road that might be waiting just for you to reach where they are and willing enough to keep you fueled enough to push to the end of the road.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Mortality
When the time comes, who will be there? What will they be doing? Have you really thought about your life, whom you touched, how you touched them, and if they will be there? Really think about it, your age now, then think about how many years you have left to work, and then about how many years you have left after that. I have done all of this and know that I do not have that many good years left to make things the way I want them to be. When you do think about it in that way, you realize you better move faster in your life to be able to do things you really have always wanted to do, places to go, people to see.
There is always going to be an ending, but when will it come and how will it happen. That is something that no one knows or can answer. Although many have tried, they can only speculate on the ending and what really happens. It all comes down to belief. For me, the end is the end, nothing more, nothing less. You do all you can to live the best way you can and know how, to be happy and make others happy along the way. I do know there are many that live a life of complete lonliness, but that is a decision they choose. I for one, want to leave something behind to be remembered by. But, who will do the remembering?
The end comes for all of us sooner or later. Those that choose to take their time now on their own are either cowards and can not face what is in front of them. Or, they do it out of health reasons or mental reasons. But all of us have a time limit here in this life, an expiration date is stamped somewhere on or in us. Mortality is something no one can escape.
There is always going to be an ending, but when will it come and how will it happen. That is something that no one knows or can answer. Although many have tried, they can only speculate on the ending and what really happens. It all comes down to belief. For me, the end is the end, nothing more, nothing less. You do all you can to live the best way you can and know how, to be happy and make others happy along the way. I do know there are many that live a life of complete lonliness, but that is a decision they choose. I for one, want to leave something behind to be remembered by. But, who will do the remembering?
The end comes for all of us sooner or later. Those that choose to take their time now on their own are either cowards and can not face what is in front of them. Or, they do it out of health reasons or mental reasons. But all of us have a time limit here in this life, an expiration date is stamped somewhere on or in us. Mortality is something no one can escape.
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